Me: Tucker, do you know I have a mommy?
T: No. [With a budding smile, since he clearly thinks it's both absurd and fascinating that someone may have parented me.]
M: I do. Do you know who it is?
[Pause.]
M: It's Grandma. Grandma is my mommy.
T: [Gasp.] Dramma?!
M: Yes. And I have a daddy. Do you know who my dad is?
T: No! [How is it possible that I could have two parents?]
M: It's Poppa. Poppa is my dad.
T: Poppa! [How about that?!]
M: And, I am married. Who am I married to?
T: Ohio.
M: No, not Ohio. Somebody is my husband. Who is it?
T: Tricia.
M: No, that's my name. Who is my husband?
T: [Pause.]
M: It's Daddy. I'm married to Daddy.
T: [Gasp. This is all apparently so alarming to him.] Daddy?!
M: Yes. It's Daddy. And I have a brother. Who is my brother?
T: Tyler.
M: No, Tyler is your brother. Who is my brother?
T: Mason.
M: No, Mason is Reece's brother. (Tucker and Tyler's best friends are Reece and Mason. Clearly, if Mason is somebody's brother, then he must be mine too.) My brother is Uncle Rob.
T: [Gasp.] Uncle Rob?? I love Uncle Rob! He's my favorite!
M: I know you do. I love him, too. He's my brother.
(It suddenly occurs to Tuck that I must have had the most fun childhood ever, if Uncle Rob is my brother. He's beaming in the backseat.)
I should have let it go, on that happy note. But no, ever the teacher in pursuit of long term comprehension, I decided to review.
M: Who is my husband, Tuck?
T: Tricia.
M: Who is my mommy?
T: Ohio.
M: Who is my daddy?
T: Uncle Rob.
M: Who is my brother?
T: Tyler. No, Mason.
Um, no. No, no, and no. We'll keep working on it.
Actually your brother has long been convinced that you did indeed have the very best childhood ever, just because you got to have him as your brother. And I imagine Rob is so glad that finally someone else agrees.
ReplyDelete