Loose Change.

I was only half awake this morning when I could feel someone's hand inside the sleeve of my pajamas. I opened my eyes: Tuck.

"I need my penny."

"I don't have your penny."

"Yes, you do. It's in there."

He tried fishing around in there, in search of his penny. Seriously? In my pajamas? We argued a bit, as I insisted that it was too early to be awake, and I didn't have his penny in my jammies. Hands out, thank you very much.

I sat up to get my bearings, and sure enough, a quarter fell out of my shirt.

"Oh, there it is. Thanks, Mommy."

He snatched it up, and he went back to bed.

(What? What just happened?)

* * * Fast-forward to late afternoon * * *

Tuck was running and playing hard, and his breathing started to get a bit labored. Wheezing causes great alarm at our house, so I told him to stop running and let me listen to his breath.

I put my ear against his chest, and he said, "You hear the penny in there?"

"What?" I'm sorry... did he just say...?

"A penny in there. I ate it." Gulp.

"There's a penny in there??"

"Yep. You hear it?"

Oh, for crying out loud. He ate a blasted penny. Or a quarter. Nobody knows for sure, except that he definitely ingested money of some kind. The doctor said we need to watch his you-know-what for a week, and we'll see if a penny shows up. If not, then Tuck will have an X-ray to see where it may have stopped along the way.

And so we'll wait. And see.

(Honestly. Unbelievable.)

It's Genetic. Apparently.

"Yummy, Mommy. Drink. Mmmm." Tyler was licking his lips. His cheeks were wet.

"Oh, did you get a drink, buddy?"

"Yes. Water. Yummy."

Only then did it occur to me that there was nothing on the second floor of the mountain condo from which he might get a drink. And he was gated in while I packed to bring us home. Houdini had found somewhere to quench his thirst, and I was afraid to ask.

"Where did you find your drink?"

"Molly's water. Yummy."

Oh, dear. "Please show me, Tyler."

And without reservation, he walked into the bathroom, knelt on his hands and knees, and lapped water from Molly's dog dish on the floor.

Oh, gross. Ew. Seriously. The things I have to teach him not to do. Astounding to me.

I texted my mom, in a frenzy of disgust.

Her response?

"I'm sorry to tell you, but it's genetic. When you were two, you ate dog food out of a dog's bowl at a Christmas party. The hostess brought you to me, apologizing and unsure of how much you'd eaten. But you helped yourself."

From what I hear, it was the social event of the season - a packed house of elite guests. And there was Polly's daughter, dressed in holiday satin and frills, munching from the dog's bowl. I'm sure she was thrilled.

So, in retrospect, a quiet lick-lick from Molly's dish isn't quite so mortifying. (Still, we're going to try to nip that new habit.)

And hey, I lived to tell about it. Or rather, to be told about it.

(I wish Tyler had taken after his dad on this one...)

Vacationing... With Toddlers.

There is nothing like a relaxing vacation....and those five days were nothing like a relaxing vacation.

A Vacation with Toddlers should really go by a different name. Perhaps, "A Change in the Routine which Exhausts Everyone and Makes More Work for Mommy and Daddy." That would be more accurate.

So, I needed to let go of the idea that I would relax or feel renewed by caring for my children outside their natural environment. Once I realized what this wasn't, I could more fully embrace what it was.

It was...
Close quarters for the four of us.
A chance to really look at my children.

Really, really look at them.
Long walks.
Late desserts.
My birthday, on location.

Mountain views.
Lots of firsts.
New memories. Ours.

Us.

"With kids, it's a trip. Without kids, it's a vacation."

Someday, we'll go on a vacation. And perhaps I'll miss their packed lunches, fruit snacks, songs in the car, I Spy, poor sleeping, soggy towels, mosquito bites, kiddie pools, broken crayons, backseat fights, muddy shoes, spray-on sunscreen, board books, dirty faces, DVDs, and ragged bedtimes.

But for the first few days of that vacation, I'll enjoy the quiet stillness.

And then I'll miss them.

You Gotta' Have a Good Wind Up.

This cracks me up. Every time.