I bought some new furniture this week, in my pursuit of a new look, the redefinition, the beauty of new surroundings to ease the fall into the new truths.
As I was paying, I asked them to update my records with my cell phone number instead of Robb's.
I said, "Is my husband's name on the file?"
The salesman, who had referred to me as smart, beautiful, and 'a trophy', winked at me and said, "No, ma'am. Break away. Just break away."
He assumed I was separated or divorced, glad to be finished. He assumed I'm pleased to take his name off the account.
And I was too taken aback to disagree, to right the story, too weary to make him know that's not how it is.
But that is very much not how it is.
I just stared at him blankly.
He just didn't deserve the strength it would cost me to tell him the truth.
I just didn't have it. I offered him nothing.