I chose to share one recently, and I thought, "Oh, Tyler is still such a baby in that one. I should find one where he's older. A picture that's more up to date."
And in that moment, it occurred to me: from now on, the pictures of the four of us will be outdated. They will portray who we were.
My choices will be few: 1) pictures of the four of us where our children are babies, toddlers, or preschoolers; or 2) a current picture without Robb in it.
The family portrait on the wall - it's a memory.
Next year's Christmas card will have just three of us. And I suppose there is a strength in that, as opposed to some weird PhotoShop fanciwork with his head hovering oddly above us. Anything that says he's here isn't true.
There are three of us.
The pictures I have of him are all the pictures I will have of him.
I must hold tightly.
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