Thursday, August 4, 2011


My brakes are acting weird.
Three lightbulbs are burnt out in the bathroom.
Student loans are due.
License tags need renewed.
It might be recycle week. It might not.
Either way, I need to take out the trash.
The handle to the dresser drawer came off.
I would like to hang that picture.
My car needs to be washed.
It's time to get the mail.
I probably need an oil change again.
I wonder what our vision insurance benefits are.
The Costco membership needs renewed.
I need to get the carpets cleaned.
The American Express bill came.
The bank thinks he's still alive.

It's not that all of these tasks belonged to him;
it's just that now they all belong to me.

We made a good team. We shared roles well.
I realize now that I only thought about what I needed to.
He took good care of me.

Now it is the minutiae of details that so often keep me from coming anywhere near the giant, blazing, unchanging truth:

He's really gone.